Despite my mentors who chide I should remember why I began my blog in the first place and not get bogged down in Google Analytics or user traffic trivia, I confess I have felt a bit uncertain lately here at bh.

Most of that has to do with family process as we straddle a limbo that weathers and blisters in turns.

Those of you that know and love me know you should never, ever, never consider throwing me a surprise party. I am not wired that way, and the heart of the gesture would be lost in the dysfunction of my insecurity.

However, I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE surprise and Just Because Gifts.

I love to give Just Because Gifts, and I am happy to receive them too because they are so rare and precious.

Imagine my delight then when I awoke to find this message from @gurple7 on Twitter:

…stumbled onto your website tonight when looking at various lyrics for “Hallelujah” by all of the artists that covered it to use in my blog. Love some of your posts and poked around a bit to look for a way to subscribe to your feed. Saw the recent tweets and “CHO” in one and then followed you to Twitter to find out if we live in the same town! (We do, by the way) How very cool. So you have a new follower who stumbled on you through several clicks on an internet search and lives nearby.

@gurple7 had given me the most unexpected Just Because gift in recent memory.

What she could not have known is I wondered of late if my blog was able to touch people. Naturally, I hit her blog, easily amused. I was humbled to find:

When there are no words…

This song always makes me teary and is perplexing so I have looked at different versions of lyrics many times in the past and was familiar with the long list of sites and blogs that try to interpret the lyrics. In my search tonight, Google returned way too many sites for me to read through, but after clicking on the third or fourth page of results, I ended up at a blog. A beautiful blog simply titled Broken Hallelujah. Each post ends with a portion of lyrics from the song. The writer is so poetic and genuine…though writing under a pseudonym. I was poking around trying to find a way to sign up for an RSS feed or subscription to posts when I noticed some recent tweets mentioning “CHO”. No, she couldn’t be. But obviously, I followed that rabbit trail, and yes, she is! She lives in Charlottesville! How fun is that!? I read more of her posts. Would have come to tears several times, except, as we have already established tonight, my emotions are congested.

And so, when there are no words

…I did my best, it wasn’t much
I couldn’t feel, so I tried to touch
I’ve told the truth, I didn’t come to fool you
And even though it all went wrong
I’ll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah…

The gift of her insight galvanized my entire day.

Just Because one kind woman invested the time not just to read my words, but reach out to me, I remember why I lift my own broken hallelujah.

This was a Just Because Gift that bridged the anonymous internet and impacted me personally.

It was a Just Because Gift that reconnected me to the journey of why I began broken hallelujah.

It is also a reminder of why I continue.

I do it connect with The Light of the World, my process and my Praise.

I do it to use the voice Love lends me and thank Him for Provision.

I write to return to Him when so that I do not drown in my own misguided self-reliance and pride.

I am called to Trust Him here.

@gurple7 published the Truth more succinctly than I have ever said it:

And so, when there are no words

…I did my best, it wasn’t much
I couldn’t feel, so I tried to touch
I’ve told the truth, I didn’t come to fool you
And even though it all went wrong
I’ll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah…

Amen, Sister.

Halleulujah!