Happy Easter

We share the humility and suffering of Christ and also share His conquest of death and find a new life after we’ve died

~C.S. Lewis

We are grateful to celebrate Easter this year with each other.

We are grateful for the opportunity to be with our Home Group.

We love Lindt bunnies.

We chomp Lindt hazelnut carrots.

We rejoice in the possibilities of Resurrection.

Our consensus as a family is that this year we enjoyed a day that celebrated the Face of Love more than jelly beans.

May the year ahead develop our characters to be brighter Lights and more eager feet in the Body.

Happy Easter.

He’s alive! He’s alive!

We can trust Him.

Please join our ardent and constant prayers that Ashley is healed completely in a way that shows all the Wonder of the World and Glorifies His name.

Help Ashley come awake.

Come awake.

Come awake.

Come and rise up, Ashley.

We truly believe in Resurrection!

Thy will be done.

Nothing that is asked of me compares or is beyond my strength Through Him that gave all.

We can trust Him.

Let no one caught in sin remain
inside the lie of inward shame.

Hallelujah, Hallelujah,
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah!

Prayer Vigil

Holy Saturday.

I gathered with the Body on the front lawn of Ashley’s house for a prayer vigil.

We joined hands in a circle.

We lifted our voices to cry out to the Light of the World.

Even the robins joined us to glorify Love and pray for healing.

We prayed.

We sang Praise.

We faithfully lifted our hopes by prayer and petition, Thanksgiving we presented our requests to God,
as the Peace that transcends all understanding filled our hearts with Love.

We can trust You.

We do trust You.

Help Ashley come awake.

Come awake.

Come awake.

Come and rise up, Ashley.

And so,  if I really believe in Resurrection, I must surrender anew.

Thy will be done.

Nothing that is asked of me compares or is beyond my strength Through Him that gave all.

We can trust Him.

Let no one caught in sin remain
inside the lie of inward shame.

Hallelujah, Hallelujah,
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah!

Rain Day!

Saturday mornings in our house usually entail an obstacle course that rivals Quantico. This morning, however, I awoke to a still darkened room and house. It took me a moment to orient, as the digital data of the alarm clock did not match the house’s stillness. Gradually, my ears woke up enough to register the pattering of rain on the roof.

Rain Day!
All fields closed!

I sunk back into the still-warm dumpling of our duvet. I sighed with enough breath that it made my nose whistle.

A Rain Day is the parental equivalent of a Snow Day. The difference between the two is infinite. On a Snow Day, the kids’ plans go on hiatus, but parents must still work, triage care for the children, and brave treacherous road conditions.

On Rain Days, conversely, the entire family’s plans go on hiatus. Like a precious pearl on the shore, a Rain Day is not just a found treasure, but a day that the family calendar is free. I know you’re busy too and appreciate a free day on the family calendar is more rare than a blue moon.

Children’s literature heralds the magical properties of the blue moon. On such days unicorns can be freed from captivity, princesses can be awoken from spells, gardens can bloom healing plants, and peace can arc like a rainbow against a dark sky.

Do you know what my girls are doing right now?

Ask me.
Come on, I know that you want to know.

All three of them, and a BFF, are snuggled under a blanket watching Tangled and eating Jelly Belly jellybeans.

Before you call a dentist or go all legalistic on my Mamma logic, I want to testify that they are doing this thrills me.

Like so many, too many children of this modern age, my children are over booked and under rested.

Being under rested is different from being sleep deprived. Generally speaking, my children get enough sleep. They do not, however, get enough rest. Just like you and me; the extra-curricular activities portion my children’s time into pieces. They desire and have chosen how their time is metered, but they are constantly on the go.

This rest is a blessed Sabbath.

Today, in addition to Jelly Belly jelly beans we have planned:

4 haircuts.
(The kids have not had hair cuts since November, and, as they are novel, enjoy them as a treat)
Family Home Movie.
Ruffles & Dean’s Dip.
Smartfood Popcorn.

The kids will enjoy egg pizza for dinner, and the husband has been delightedly musing over a shrimp creaole recipe for hours. It’s almost as fussy as is he, and his delight is more poignant than the cayenne pepper in the air.

I would write more, but this fruit is time gifted from a bonus day and the wine decants to fill my cup.

Well there was a time when you let me know
What’s really going on below
But now you never show that to me do you?
And remember when I moved in you?
And the holy dove was moving too
And every breath we drew was Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah!

Home

Being away from home last week allowed me to appreciate things about our home that I don’t always attend to during the normal rhythm.

We stayed at The Husband’s brother’s house for 8 nights.

He and his family could not have been more accommodating or welcoming.

In fact, The Boy wanted to take Auntie D home.

Their gracious hospitality aside, what I missed most about our home being in our own space.

I missed being able to go to the ‘frig in the middle of the night in my underwear and drink from the milk carton.

I missed having room to spread out my toothbrush and face lotion.

I missed the kids knowing where find things without help.

I missed missed wiping the kitchen counters.

I missed eating as little or as often as I liked.

I missed my laminator.

I missed The Husband being able to sleep through the night.

I missed decompressing the day with the kids while setting the table and boiling pasta.

I missed shoes in cubbies or closets.

I missed the simple routines that makes our house a home.

I missed our night-night song.

I missed the simple comfort of comfort.

I missed the hills of Charlottesville enshrouded by our blanket of community.

I missed home.

I love our home.

I love our babies.

I love our babies in our home.

I love being in our bed in The Husband’s arms.

I am so grateful to be home.

I did my best, it wasn’t much
I couldn’t feel, so I tried to touch
I’ve told the truth, I didn’t come to fool you
And even though
It all went wrong
I’ll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah!

April Showers

bring May flowers,

Spring Breaks,

and the end-of-the-school-year-chase.

International Day.
Grandparent’s Day.
3-D extra-credit projects.
Soccer games.
Circulatory System Brochures.
Curtain Please!
Plays, plays and more plays!
Dances.
Field Trips.
Wax Museums.
Soccer games.
Character Lunch.
Junior Proms.
Teacher Appreciation Week.
Book Reports.
Science Projects.
More soccer games.
Spring Fling.

May’s forecasts even more densely packed calendar items…

(And, yes, we are still expected to grocery shop and do the laundry. Gotta keep those soccer uniforms clean.)

Time to grab your track shoes,
take your vitamins,
maintain a sense of humor,
safeguard the kids’ rest,
(They get so mean when they are sleep deprived…)
and hug each other.
Often.

It’s too easy to forget the reason we run this obstacle course in the first place is for the kids.

Our kids are hardworking and talented.
They are eager and beautiful.

The next couple months can be a festival of stress, or a time to soak in their childhoods and invest in family relationships.

God grant me the wisdom to celebrate this time of year and dance with my children in a festival of Thanksgiving.

Well Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you
she tied you to her kitchen chair
And she broke your throne and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah!

Extended Family Lens

My family safely arrived in Florida despite tornado-related flight delays.

As I previously mentioned the postponement, I offer the tornado context with humility.

I wonder if I would have been able to hang on to my happy Zen with the same gracious grip had I known we were flying into tornado warnings.

There were enough generational allusions to the Wizard of Oz that we had to agree to, “Stop it already, my little pretty.”

We hit Fort Meyers late with a robust agenda for the evening and next day, so our initial entry into the area felt more like work than vacation.

Today we slept in and woke up to sunshine and vacation.

It was a pancake morning and afterward the kids poured into the pool like maple syrup.

They swam like giggling porpoises in an eighty-degree pool, jumping from the steaming hot tub back to the pool as I left for a long run.

The time alone gave me time to filter recent experience.

It occurred to me that this visit with extended family is much like going to the ophthalmologist.

You know that part of the exam when the doctor puts that big, metal mask in front of your face and each time he adjusts the lens she asks you, “Which is better, 1 or 2?”

The beauty of family, of course, is that there is no exact prescription. You don’t have to walk out the door with one pair of glasses.

Like the best of buffets, we get to love and be loved by everyone.

The versatility of our family allows us to benefit from seeing our children from the unique lens of their love.

Each of the family members who love our babies helps us see them in a different way:

D: Their D honors this season in our lives. Her children are now grown, and when her eyes light our babies, they magnify the honor we have been given to have this season with these little people and be their parents.

Uncle T: The Baby couldn’t wait to get to Uncle T’s house, because his eyes sees each of our children as individuals of incredible potential. His perspective helps us appreciate the enormity of their futures, an easy thing for us to lose sight of when buried in laundry and bills.

G: One of D’s adult daughters, I see The Oldest Girl’s face when she looks at my girls. Her lens of love for her mother is entirely unconditional, and I am filled with wonder to imagine what our relationships with our children will be when they are adults.

Pappaw: Pappaw’s eyes have the steady gaze of a patriarch. They are our earthly lens of yesterday, today and tomorrow.

Mamma-in-Law: Her eyes are like baptism. Her gaze renews our sense of wonderi.

Tia: Tia’s love endures and stands watch over our babies like a sentry. She helps us guard what is most important.

L: L’s eyes connect us to the simple delight of reunion. As much one of us as one of our own, she helps us see who we are as a family.

The members of our extended family help us see the gifts of our nuclear family more clearly and we are grateful for their lenses.

Well baby I’ve been here before
I’ve seen this room and I’ve walked this floor
I used to live alone before I knew ya
I’ve seen your flag on the marble arch
Love is not a victory march
It’s a cold and it’s a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah!

Flight Delayed

Flight delayed.

Normally this would challenge my patience. However, as so many of the people around me have already ditched their cool, the theater of their responses offers experience enough.

I do not delight in their frustration. I’m just happy that in this one moment, I have declined the invitation to throw a temper tantrum. So as I look across me at the frustrated mother that tosses anger grenades on her children like a pitching machine, I know that has been me. I know that could be me. No finger pointing, simply grateful for this reprieve for my own family.

Flight delayed sets the table for an unexpected repast, a welcome opportunity to sit still as my thoughts go ambulatory.

For instance, I realize that I have not been at an airport since my recent binge of the entire six seasons of Lost on Netflix. I admit that I miss Hurly and still wonder why Ben Linus wouldn’t go into the church, what work he felt called to finish. Lost was a festival of brokenness, broken people, broken island, broken relationships. As I look around me, I marvel how intact people appear outwardly in their Ralph Lauren shirts and Reef flip flops that comfortably stage caramel-apple-brown pedicures while inwardly, we’re all like Jack and Kate. Or Libby, I’d rather be a Libby than a Kate, tragic end notwithstanding.

If you were a character on Lost, which character would you be and why?

The Baby just asked if she could peel off with The Husband to help him find lunch. She skipped into his open arms with a giggle joy like you hear in a family neighborhood when the ice-cream truck lets rip its siren song that promises Dreamsicles. She leapt into her father’s arms and knew she was perfectly happy and completely loved. It struck me as she did that she really had no idea where they were going. She was in the harbor of her father’s arms and trusted its safety and his direction. It was one of those Abba moments when I drank in the presence of my Father’s arms that cradle me in every day. Would that I trust His Direction with the purity that my daughter just found in her papa’s embrace.

Flight delayed.

Just the phrase tags associations like kids call “You’re It!” at the park.

Developmental delay.

Delayed satisfaction.

There’s been a slight delay.

Don’t delay, buy today.

Delayed payment.

Traffic delays.

I’ve been delayed.

Running late.

Late fees.

Late payment penalties.

I’m late. (tardy)

I’m late. (preggers)

Regardless of the spin, I’m socially wired to abhor delays.

Oh so, Verruca, “I want it now!”

I want to be on time!

I’m Bard-bent to participate on my own terms, “Hold me not, let me go!”

Delay quickens stress that spins the balance of my over-scheduled paces like the Tea Cups at Disney Land.

As I sit here with a boarding pass that won’t let me go anywhere any time soon and front row tickets to the anxiety antics of the would-be passengers all around me, I realize how ridiculously I strive to drive my agenda on my own strength.

I am not freaking out, because this delay has absolutely nothing to do with the work that I do for others. It’s just an inconvenience, not a hardship to those who count on me. In this blessed context, not one person waits for me to arrive on the other end. I am not late to pick up a child. I am not late for a meeting. I am not late to teach a lesson. I am not late to carry a meal.

No one is disappointed.

I’m not missing anything.

I’m just delayed.

This makes me reconsider how The Baby jumped into her papa’s arms. His embrace captured her delight even though she did not know where they were going or what they might find once they got there.

I need to trust the One that made not only me, but Time itself. I want to jump into the arms of He who breathed Life into the Universe and delight even though I don’t know where I am going or what I will find when I get there.

As her papa carried The Baby down the concourse in search of a chicken sandwich, she looked ahead and smiled confidently.

Flight delayed.

Trust My timing.

I am going to snuggle up in the arms of Love, sit in this chair and smile.

I am not one minute late.

His Love lets me go.

His Love sets me free.

I did my best, it wasn’t much
I couldn’t feel, so I tried to touch
I’ve told the truth, I didn’t come to fool you
And even though
It all went wrong
I’ll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah!

The Same List

The 7 Deadly Habits catalogs them.

How to Win Friends and Influence People is the grandfather of all skills books about them.

It’s even on Twitter:

NoWealthButLife Love doesn’t just sit there like a stone; it has to be made, like bread, remade all the time, made new. -Ursula K. LeGuin 3/30/11 11:07 AM

The Beatitudes pours them upon a crowd from a mountain top

The largest measure of earthly joy we receive and share is relational.

The largest anguish of earthly sorrow we mine is relational.

We are a relational creation wired to plug into each other and create community.

Dr. Covey, Dale Carnegie, LeGuin and Christ all talk about the same list of behaviors that seed and wound relationships:

Behaviors that Wound Relationships

• impatience
• intolerance
• blaming
• jealousy
• pride
• shame
• selfishness
• unforgiving
• malevolence
• self-righteousness
• abuse
• suspicion
• fear
• worry
• hopelessness

Behaviors that Seed/Maximize Relationships

• patience
• acceptance
• affirmation
• humility
• wonder
• Grace
• honor another
• keeps no record
• rejoices in truth
• protects
• trusts
• hopes
• loves

Each day we are given an opportunity to Trust Love and move in community.

The behaviors we choose bring wounding or fruit to those around us.

I have been given this gift of today.

My children have been given this gift of today.

Together we have an opportunity to follow the Call of Love upon our lives together.

There are relational valleys in the lives of a couple of the girls I most love in this season.

I pray that together we may build upon the wise relational templates all around us.

I trust my Portion Deliverer will fill our every deficit so that we may support each other to not just walk it out, but dance it in a joyous gig accompanied by Praise!

With my love and my sadness
I come before You Lord
My heart’s in a thousand pieces
Maybe even more

Yet I trust in this moment
You’re with me somehow
And You’ve always been faithful
So Lord even now

When all that I can sing
Is a broken hallelujah
When my only offering
Is shattered praise
Still a song of adoration
Will rise up from these ruins
I will worship You and give You thanks
Even when my only praise
Is a broken hallelujah

xoxo

It’s only a matter of time before it happens.

It might be in a tweet.

Or an email to one of the kids’ teachers.

Or at the end of a post.

Or in a comment on another writer’s blog.

Or in a memo to parents.

Or in a letter note to the pastor

Most likely it will be in a text.

Yeah, that’s the most likely, in a text, and without appropriate relational context, like to a parent of a kid spending the night over with one of mine.

It’s really a more a question of when, not if.

Cuz I’m the mother who already accidentally hit Reply All instead of Reply and thanked The Husband, “For the most sweet and gentle of kisses,” to all the parents in The Boy’s then third-grade class.

And I’m the mother who drove to the wrong soccer field twice in the same week.

I’m also the mom who misquotes her own children’s birth dates at the doctors office.

So, now that I have adopted the “xoxo” as part of my email closing to intimates, it’s simply a matter of time.

In order to save time, may I preemptively say:

xoxo to the kids’ principal.
xoxo to the lawn care service that sent us a job quote.
xoxo to the mom who wrote for help with the fencing car pool.
xoxo to the volunteer coordinator.
xoxo to the grocery store credit card slip.
xoxo on the kindergartener’s reading log.
xoxo on the field trip permission form.
xoxo on the Friday folder.

XOXO!

And even though
It all went wrong
I’ll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah!

Sunshine Baskets

You Are My Sunshine My only sunshine. You make me happy When skies are grey. You’ll never know, dear, How much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away
A day off school. 3 5th graders. 1 Kindergartener. 1 Pre-K lad. 2 babies. 3 cases of mixed Florida citrus. 7 hearts hungry to serve.
The other nite, dear, As I lay sleeping I dreamed I held you in my arms. When I awoke, dear, I was mistaken And I hung my head and cried
32 quarts of Strawberrys. 37 baskets. 7 kinds of sunshine shinys to decorate cards, “Thank you for the Sunshine you bring to our lives every day!”
You are my sunshine, My only sunshine. You make me happy When skies are grey. You’ll never know, dear, How much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away.

2 schools filled with hard-working teachers worthy of celebration.

4 families in need.

I’ll always love you
And make you happy
If you will only say the same
But if you leave me
To love another
You’ll regret it all some day;

Door to door and face to face deliveries.

Eager hands serving.

Grateful hands receiving.

You Are My Sunshine
My only sunshine.
You make me happy
When skies are grey.
You’ll never know, dear,
How much I love you.
Please don’t take my sunshine away

Lessons about Community Service imprint hearts.

Children walk out Love’s greatest command.

Intentional love freely given.

And it’s not a cry that you hear at night
It’s not somebody who’s seen in the light
It’s a cold and it’s a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah!