First, I want you to know that I received an unprecedented number of questions in regard to the thong post including my first, official piece of hate mail from the infamous Annonymous.

I’ll field a couple of those queries before a post about bananas.

Question #1:  Do you kiss your Jesus with that dirty mouth of yours?

(Granted, I paraphrase, but that’s the gist of his question.)

Answer: 

My initial response to the hate mail was humor. I thought it was hillarious that Anonymous was upset about a topic as “base as underwear,” and as scandalous as a real life  thong incident. I allowed myself liscence to mock his poor spelling and syntax.

I find the hate mail much less humorous in retrospect.

Though I am convinced that Jesus knows exaclty what happened to me in the closet that day, how I was clad, and why I chose to write about it later, I loathe to contemplate that anything I post in this venue might do anything other than bring glory to the name of the Lord.

Yes.

I kiss my Jesus with my dirty mouth.
I am a sinner.
He was pierced for my trangressions
and crushed for my sins.
How scandalous a thing is my salvation?

I respect
the sanctity of this space
and believe it God-given.

I do not write hate.
I splash Love.
I do not post superfluous profanity.
I sing Praise.
I do not publish sewage.
I whisper prayers.

In fact,
usually when my blog
goes quiet
for a series of
still days
it is
to mute my process
until my bitter
recycles content.

My heart’s desire
with my gift
of New Life
is to be of good use
and Glorify His name.

Question #2: Are you too busy to blog or curled up sucking your toe?

Answer:  

I have been working out with a new friend who is not only a certified, personal trainer, but also a former University of Virginia woman’s basketball player that went to the Final 4 and graduated from UVA.

She assured me that if I continue working on my flexibility I will, in time, not only be able to master the splits that have eluded me my entire life, but also able to suck my own toe.

I promise to send pictures if ever I accomplish either feat.

In truth, this question was posed by one of bestest ever friends.

The toe references perseveration and my penchant to rabbit.

I will not rabbit, Johnny come lately.

I will hold.

Likewise, as you know, I’ve been engaged in fierce combat with literal and figurative vermin.

Question #3: Are you at the bottom of your closet and unable to get up?

Answer: 

Dignity aside, I remain unscathed by the Thong Incident of 2011.

I was not harmed and no animals were injured in the making of the youtube clip.

That said, I had a provocative encounter with a Demi Uplift bra that attempted to stow away in the dryer. I will spare you the ugliness that ensued out of respect to Anon.

Question #4: Are you ok? I miss your voice.

Answer:

I got still
to open my ears
and lift my eyes
to my Maker.

I am more than ok,
I am confident
I am in the middle
of His Will.

He is so busy with
my heart
right now that
I just might
burst out
a love song.

Question #5: How are the kids?

Answer:

My girls surrounded the kitchen island like commanders in front of a tactical board Sunday.

The focus of each girl was complete and they rotated turns and roles with the precision of the dancing fingers of ancient merchants on abacus beads in the market place.

I was relegated to the stool behind the sink…

but that’s a story that I will have to finish next time.

It’s about love,
dalmation spotted
bananas
and ministry.

Until then, thank you for your comments, emails and messages.

It means more than you realize to know that you walk this with me.

How great is our God!

Namaste.
I send you my love.
xoxo

Well I heard there was a secret chord
That David played, and it pleased the Lord
But you don’t really care for music, do ya?
Well it goes like this
The fourth, the fifth
The minor fall and the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah!